Texts From Last Night

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  (303): View more from Colorado

  well if you came here i would keep you awake :*

  (1-303): View more from Colorado

  did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay

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  (303): well if you came here i would keep you awake :* (1-303): did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay http://tfl.nu/u4mn
  Replies (6) Good night (531) Bad night (1352) Order T-Shirt
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  (573): View more from Missouri

  My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.

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  (573): My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best. http://tfl.nu/21y4
  Replies (14) Good night (2366) Bad night (476) Order T-Shirt
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.

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  (860): I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder. http://tfl.nu/zegq
  Replies (17) Good night (4164) Bad night (442) Order T-Shirt
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  (253): View more from Washington

  You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!

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  (253): You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!! http://tfl.nu/4k8v
  Replies (50) Good night (2360) Bad night (6260) Order T-Shirt
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  I just snuked. Sneezed and puked

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  (608): I just snuked. Sneezed and puked http://tfl.nu/izkl
  Replies (16) Good night (1065) Bad night (6305) Order T-Shirt
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?

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  (256): oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me? http://tfl.nu/06bl
  Replies (20) Good night (1023) Bad night (5542) Order T-Shirt
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.

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  (402): Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier. http://tfl.nu/f40g
  Replies (16) Good night (2859) Bad night (1446) Order T-Shirt
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  (302): View more from Delaware

  This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.

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  (302): This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night. http://tfl.nu/kdws
  Replies (8) Good night (2915) Bad night (1398) Order T-Shirt
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us

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  (313): We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us http://tfl.nu/w5tj
  Replies (2) Good night (2212) Bad night (981) Order T-Shirt
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life

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  (443): She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life http://tfl.nu/dd6j
  Replies (16) Good night (4538) Bad night (660) Order T-Shirt
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  (316): View more from Kansas

  You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.

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  (316): You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath. http://tfl.nu/tem9
  Replies (2) Good night (1509) Bad night (674) Order T-Shirt
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  (516): View more from New York

  why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?

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  (516): why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka? http://tfl.nu/od3j
  Replies (12) Good night (1112) Bad night (646) Order T-Shirt
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  (478): View more from Georgia

  Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.

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  (478): Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy. http://tfl.nu/ujmz
  Replies (15) Good night (3243) Bad night (502) Order T-Shirt
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me

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  (203): I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me http://tfl.nu/c2wo
  Replies (6) Good night (982) Bad night (244) Order T-Shirt
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.

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  (317): He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life. http://tfl.nu/c0aw
  Replies (6) Good night (239) Bad night (1405) Order T-Shirt

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