didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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