Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
we made out on top of his cat.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
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