There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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