it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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