i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize