i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
Randomize