why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize