I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
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Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Randomize