God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
She's the barista slut.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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