omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize