I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Randomize