so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
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On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
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I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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