I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Randomize