I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize