I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
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