I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize