Why are handjobs necessary in class?
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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