I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Randomize