Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Randomize