I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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