hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize