i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
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we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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