Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
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