You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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