You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Randomize