My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
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