Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Randomize