I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
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