if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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