He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize