I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize