a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
I'm at about main and main street
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
I yelled at your uterus for you.
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