I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
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