You can't motorboat a personality
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
True college students do jello shots in the library
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