dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
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