angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize