Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Randomize