Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Randomize