dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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