this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I have so many feelings about this burrito
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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