Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize