I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
My ass is underappreciated
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
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I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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