Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
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