bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
I have tasted many bathrooms
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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