hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
He kissed a someone with a penis
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
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