That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
My breasts were aching with rage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
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