I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Pooping to opera.
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