I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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