Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize